Why Does the Word Retirement Make You Cringe?
Do You Have a Hard Time Saying You're Retired?
Why is that? Shouldn’t we all be proud? After all, that means you completed a major chapter in your life, right? And isn’t that something to feel good about? Is there something just rooted in that word that brings up impressions you don’t identify with? Or maybe you just didn’t have the opportunity to properly adjust to this new label and this new way of life.
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Where Does that Feeling Come From?
Perhaps that cringe reaction is rooted in this ‘work till you drop’ mentality that presided over the last few decades and was certainly over arching much of your work years.
Does this sound familiar? You would trudge into work even if you felt ill. After all, only the weak, under-performers called in sick. How many times did you drag your sorry self onto that train (or car, bus, subway, or highway) because you were a dedicated employee. You put your team, clients, students, or organization ahead of your own health.
And of course, while at work, you probably worked well beyond the traditional 8 hour day. I remember when I started my career after college and was still living with my parents. My father looked so puzzled when I walked in at 8:00 or even 9:00 at night. “What’s wrong? Why can’t you finish your work on time?” HIs generation just didn’t follow a ‘prove your worth with long hours’ mentality.
Does That Word, ‘Retirement’ Mess with Your Self Image?
Does being retired somehow carry a negative stigma, just because you are no longer doing 60 hour work weeks?
Now on top of letting go of that work-till-you-drop self image, you layer on the memory you might have of people in your past who you knew as ‘retired’. Most were a little overweight or just not in the best physical shape. They just looked old!
And what do you remember them doing all day? Some of them maybe worked in a garden or around the house. But I bet the more likely memory of a retired person is someone who spent the whole day in front of the TV set.
No Way Are You THAT Person
When we put these images in our heads, it’s no wonder we grimace when we hear, “You’re retired?” “You mean you’re not working?”
Then comes everyone’s favorite question, “So what do you actually DO all day?” Don’t you just love that one? You either grapple around for some awe-worthy activity like, “I’m solving world hunger.” Or you want to just blurt out, “Whatever the hell I want!” Probably something in between would work well.
Maybe we just need a new word. I’ve seen headlines like, “Don’t retire, rewire.” Or one I considered for article titles, “Don’t retire, redesign.” When I talked to people about feedback on this website, they suggested terms like “turn a page” or “new chapter” to use instead of “retiring”. (That’s why you see those words on the home page.)
It’s Time for a New Image
The message here seems to be that it’s time to change the image of a retiree. You are no doubt a strong, intelligent, capable person who can do a great deal more – and want to do more – than spend these years in front of the TV adding inches to your waistline.
You Can Choose What’s Right for You
Maybe you want to keep working. There’s nothing at all wrong with that. No one says you HAVE to stop working. Even if you worked for a company that had a mandatory retirement age, that just means you had to leave THAT company. There are plenty of ways to keep earning an income after ‘retiring’.
I know that looking for a new job later in life is somewhat torturous. But this could be a great time to start something of your own. Work for yourself for a change or just dabble in something part time. There are plenty of ways to keep earning an income after retiring.
If I didn’t have the challenge of building this website, I would have been much less happy these last few years. Maybe building a website is the perfect retirement project for you too.
Retirement could be a great time for volunteering. I heard an interview with a retiring news executive (unfortunately didn’t tune in in time to catch the name) who used the phrase, “Learn – Earn – Return” to describe the phases of life. You may feel that this is your chance to enter the Return stage.
Or maybe you want to pick up or delve deeper into a hobby. Perhaps you just want to relax and have fun and make your own health a priority for a change.
Start With Small Steps
You might have some idea of what you want your retirement to look like – and how you want it defined for you. That’s great! Now you can start taking steps to get there.
Your morning coffee routine can actually be super helpful here. What do you usually do in the morning while you’re enjoying that cup of coffee? Scrolling through news feed? Social media? Email?
Why not use that time instead to map out your next step towards where you want your retirement to go. Take out a simple piece of paper, or use the ‘Now What? Block Planner’ guide. Whatever works for you. And go ahead and start putting aside specific time blocks to tackle what you want.
Hold Your Head High, Call it What You Want, Do What You Want - You Earned This!
Don’t worry about what others say or think of the term ‘retirement’. They’re probably just jealous anyway! You finally get the chance to define your own balance. Do what you want. Call it what you want. Define your retirement your own way.
Whatever you want to do with your retirement, make it your own.
“Remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”
Epicurus