Never Again Let Struggles Get You Down Using These 3 Easy Strategies
Having More Time on Your Hands Isn’t Always Good
Especially When You Are Coping with Struggles
While you may not want your work life back, did you ever wish back some of the distractions?
Whether you’re dealing with a family issue or something of your own, like a medical problem, having too much time on your hands can feel like a curse sometimes.
Everyone deals with ups and downs. That’s just life. But there’s just something about that deadline, or client, patient, co-worker or classroom that can help you detach from a problem.
So what do you do when you don’t have those anymore?
Here are three very simple steps that can hopefully help you cope.
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Stick to Your Routine (or Build One That Serves Your Needs)
Do your absolute best to maintain your normal routine.
Get out your regular calendar or just any old piece of paper. Then draw yourself a regular daily and weekly routine. Make a commitment to yourself to stick to it.
This will help keep you focused in the moment.
Does Your Current Routine Fall Short?
If your current routine isn’t strong enough to be effective, It may also be a good time to revisit that normal routine and see if it needs a boost. The ‘Now What Block Planner’ can be an effective tool for this.
Anything that helps give a sense of purpose to the hour, day, or week will help keep your mind from falling down that negative rabbit hole. An established regular routine is particularly effective if it involves a regular walk outside or any kind of outdoor function.
Having trouble sticking to the routine? Find an accountability partner.
For example, if your routine starts with a morning walk, find a neighbor to walk with you. You are much more likely to get out there if you know someone is waiting for you. Even if your partner doesn’t live nearby, make a set day and time with your partner to compare notes and talk through challenges.
It’s too easy to make excuses to yourself, much harder making them to others.
Lean on Others
Too often we think we are doing the right thing by ‘going it alone’, thinking we don’t want to burden anyone.
But think for a moment. What if someone close to you told you about a problem or a struggle they had some time ago. They tell you how it affected them and the dark days they experienced waiting for answers or a resolution. At this moment, you’re probably wishing you could have helped.
It’s human nature to help others; let people help you.
If you feel that your issue is too big to lean on one person, maybe bring together a group of support.
One person on your list may live nearby who can go on that walk with you. Another might be a morning person who could be just a phone call away in those dark morning hours when our brains tend to wonder to bad places.
Your Supporters Will Welcome Your Guidance
Tell these friends or family members that you aren’t looking for answers. You just need someone to remind you to stay off that negative road.
These interactions don’t have to be about discussing and re-discussing your problem. Maybe you can make plans to watch the same movie or TV show and then have a call to talk about it.
It’s ok to lean on others. You can pay it forward when you feel strong and ready.
Take Specific Steps to Control the Chatter in Your Head
Sometimes the mind is a terrible thing.
Internal chatter is something I know I have struggled with my whole life. And I bet I’m not alone. I’ve tried so many different approaches and tools.
But one of the best resources I’ve found is the book, Chatter, by Ethan Kross. This book gives specific and actionable steps you can take to help relieve yourself of the burden your own negative chatter can cause.
(This is an affiliate link, not to the author, but to the small business bookstore organization that distributes books – something near and dear to my heart. I earn a commission, at no additional cost to you, all of which goes directly to support ‘I Just Retired…Now What?’ to keep content flowing.)
Some of the suggestions in the earlier parts of this article relate to the book’s message. He covers ideas like distancing yourself from the issue, taking a step back. Thinking about what you would say to someone you cared about who leaned on you with a struggle similar to yours. Getting out into nature.
This summary doesn’t come close to doing it justice. Dr. Kross describes these suggestions (and so much more) in a very relatable manner. And he shows how they have proven effective in test after test.
Dr. Kross’s valuable message not only helps the person going through the struggle, but also those providing the support.
Wrap Up
If you’ve read to the end of this, then you are probably struggling with something right now. I hope you find comfort in knowing you’re not alone. Try all or some of these three steps and have confidence they can help you.
“The dark days make the bright days seem even brighter. So bright you can hardly stand it.” Sarah Addison Allen
Keep at it. You will find those brighter days.